I’m pleased to announce that the next thirteen lines of the I.P game did not take me quite as long to do as the initial, painful three. Although the presentation has taken me ages and it’s still impossible to understand what I’m saying with all the _ and / going on. But it’s the best I can do with my crappy computer skills.
The poems I have created are by no means good, but I tried my hardest with the trochaic and pyrrhic substitutions, with the enjambment and the weak endings. Possibly I could’ve done better with the subjects and actual content of the poems, but truthfully I just didn’t want to spend another moment on them.
So, feeling ever so slightly embarrassed regarding resorting to writing about the cats that live on camp; I present to you my Iambic Pentameter.
What is this? Am I completely stupid?
Subject, then the order, then the rhythm,
Finally the messing, it hurts my brain.
First saga: cookies disfigured, ugly
Not round, then two: forget the salt, vanilla,
Baking powder, and too much butter, it
Won’t matter? Three the gloopy, sticky egg,
Stays inside the shell when cracked, clear but thick.
And next week in cooking class what will happen?
Meow! You’re here and what do you want today?
To play, or chase or maybe sit down on my
Lap for a while and purr, is that too much?
The only thing you want from me is food!
And now the points!
P T
_ / _ _ _ / _ _ / _
What is this? Am I completely stupid? 10
P P W
_ / _ _ _ / _ _ _ / _
Just subject, then the order and the rhythm, 12
T P T
/ _ _ _ / _ _ / _ /
Finally the messing, it hurts my brain. 15
P T
_ / _ / _ / _ _ / _
First saga: cookies disfigured, ugly 10
T T W
/ _ _ / / _ _ / _ / _
Not round, then two: forget the salt, vanilla, 12
T P P E
/ _ _ _ _ / _ / _ _
Baking powder, and too much butter, it 17
E
_ / _ / _ / _ / _ /
Won’t matter? Three the gloopy, sticky egg, 2 (fail)
P T
_ / _ _ / _ _ / _ /
Stays inside the shell when cracked, clear but thick. 10
T T W
_ / / _ / _ _ / _ / _
And next week in cooking class what will happen? 12
T W
/ _ _ / _ / _ / _ / _
Meow! You’re here and what do you want today? 7
P W
_ / _ / _ / _ _ _ / _
To play, or chase or maybe sit down on my 7
T
/ _ _ / _ / _ / _ /
Lap for a while and purr, is that too much? 5
_ / _ / _ / _ / _ /
The only thing you want from me is food! 0(epic fail, but it's the last one so I don't care)
My total score for these lines is 119. Add to that the 30 points from the three lines in the previous entry and my score is 149. Stephen’s score was 106, which I guess makes me the winner. Ha ha, I win, I win, I win!
Although really I cheated because I didn’t deduct any points for over-use of the poetic devises, whereas Stephen was very hard on himself.
But I’m not going to dwell on that, I will simply focus on the winning part. I am the victor, and Stephen is stupid.
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